Help! I am losing interest in my wife

April 5, 2019
she is irritating me


Help! I am losing interest in my wife, in fact, she is irritating me; can’t put a finger on why I feel this way.



Whereas this is a man asking, I dare say there are many women who feel the same way about their spouse.


I would like to ask a few questions to gain a better understanding of your situation:


How old are you? Could this be an indication of mid-life crisis?

MLC loosely defined as that time of life when you question everything; the period when you compare your life with those “better” or “younger” than you. That period when you feel a sense of not having enough time left to achieve your dream etc.


The dictionary defines it as; loss of self-confidence and feeling of anxiety or disappointment that can occur in early middle age. This could be the reason why you feel this way towards your spouse.


The following can also be responsible:


Are many things buried under the carpet?

Some couples do not know how to communicate effectively, some are afraid of confronting their partners and would rather keep quiet and sweep issues under the carpet. Issues left unresolved would usually take on a life of their own and your present hatred might be the result of too many unresolved issues. Unknowingly, your affection has slowly tuned to resentment.


Is someone else getting your attention?

Did you bump into an old flame; the person you ought to marry? Is there a new staff that you find attractive? Has someone recently come for counselling and a strange chemistry you don’t understand is developing between both of you and strangely, the person seems to be all that your wife isn’t?


Have the affairs in the other room become boring?

Some Pastors have challenges in this area but we refuse to speak out. God created sex and ordained it as a means of procreation and enjoyment in marriage. If either of you is not satisfied in this area you may be bitterness.


The economic situation at home

If your wife is the main bread winner and you are beginning to feel emasculated, you may dislike her. If you are experiencing a dry season financially and your wife is not showing enough understanding in your view, you may be bitter towards her.


However, I want you to know that there is a way in the Lord.


Critically review the areas highlighted above, because there are things that can be done to resolve the issues, but space will not permit us to deal exhaustively with them here.


You may talk to a Christian Life Coach or counselor for help and resolve the issues urgently so you don’t fall into sin.





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